Our Church: Names

No mission without names

The second thing we care about (and these are in no particular order) is "No mission without names." We're working with actual people, not hypothetical ones.

Our church and mission adapts to suit the actual people we connect with. Our church changes depending on who is in it, because each person brings something different - ideas, gifts, interests, life situation, outside connections, life story etc.

For example, we don't have a children's ministry. We just try to help Lily become more like Jesus, and Isla, and Abby etc – the same as we do for each of us in the church. There are some things we do specifically with all the kids together, but overall it's different for each of them, they're all at different stages, and we acknowledge that parents are the most important spiritual influence in their children's lives. We don't officially have a children's ministry as such. We try to support the parents in whatever ways we can.

Marriage and Choice

Covenant relationships are an uncommon thing in our culture - many people don't even know what the word means. It sounds so old-fashioned. We're used to contracts - relationships that benefit me, usually without a real person on the other end, that I can get out of if I find a better offer. And we've heard the phrase "friends with benefits" frequently, which is a kind of anti-marriage - the sex without the commitment, which gives me freedom to use the "friendship" however I want, or until it doesn't benefit me anymore. No wonder marriages are breaking so frequently. We've been set up for it.

Jesus' view on marriage is a little different. If you marry a divorced woman, Jesus says, you're committing adultery with them. If you divorce your wife, you're causing them to commit adultery. Yes it's that strong. According to the Bible, the basic rule is "One person for life."

There's an escape clause if your spouse has been unfaithful, and I would add abuse to that too. Sadly this happens. But for most people it's not some kind of tragic event that drives them apart. I would argue that at the heart it's just selfishness. Because in our culture, selfishness is seen as a good thing. Keep your options open, our culture says. Something better might come along, or you might need to back out. Just do it now while it benefits you. You're worth it. Stay free.

One person for life? You can hear the objections already. What if I stop loving them? What if they get boring? What if an opportunity comes up and I'm tied down? What if they've got issues? What if their personality starts to annoy me? What if it stops me doing the things I like? "For life" is such a long time - who can really promise something that far in advance? Life happens, you know. Things change. And on and on....

We've heard them all so many times that we've started to believe them. It sounds like truth.

It's not.

Covenant relationships acknowledge that things won't always be good, that different life pathways will present themselves, that better things might come up, that the romance will go up and down and sometimes I won't be able to stand being in the same room as you, that at times you'll be boring, angry, depressed, anxious, annoying, obnoxious, irritating, unattractive, exasperating. But even if all of that happens in the same week, I am still committed to you and I will be for the rest of our lives.

I'm yours for life, for better or worse, in sickness and in health, til death do us part. Those words were written before covenant relationships faded out of our culture.

I want to bring them back. I hope you'll join me. For marriages, and also for friendships. Long-term, unselfish commitment, whatever happens. It's things like this that will change the world.

(Read Mark Sayers' book, "The Road Trip that Changed the World," for some more in-depth thoughts on these subjects, and a more intensive perspective on our culture.)

The Normality of the Bible

"When you compare the Bible to the scriptures of other religions, what is striking is the normality of the Bible. There are not gods or spiritual entities under every rock, or exhaustive descriptions of heavenly battles. Abraham is not taken away from the earth to another spiritual realm. God does speak to him, but the arena for his discipleship is the everyday. His relationship with the spiritual does not drive him away from everyday life, but instead pushes him deeper into it. The transcendent is to be found in the midst of the ordinary."

- from "The Road Trip that Changed the World," by Mark Sayers

Our Church: Monks, Cheerleaders and Activists

Our little home church has been going for a couple of years now, and I thought it might be a good time to write down a few of the things we care about. Some of these we've worked out ourselves, and a lot of it we've gratefully taken from our friends at Postcard Radio...

1. Monks, Cheerleaders and Activists
We are committed to helping each individual – adults and children – to be a monk, cheerleader and activist in their life.
Monks. Learning about who God is, his words, his way, his story, what he cares about, and who we are in relation to him. This means worship, prayer, reading the Bible, living like Jesus, etc.
Cheerleaders. Encouraging, supporting, praying, looking out for each other and the people we're connected to – in the bad and the good times.
Activists. Figuring out where each of us can make a positive difference in the world, to help bring Jesus' kingdom of heaven to earth.

More to come!