The Four Spaces of Belonging

Here's something I've found helpful for thinking about mission, networks, relationships and community: The Four Spaces of Belonging. The ideas come from Joseph Myers' book "The Search to Belong," about the ways that people connect. And here they are....

First there is the Public Space. This is a large-scale shared experience, where you feel you are part of a great number of people on the same wavelength, but you are still free to remain anonymous if you choose. E.g. A shared worship experience in a big church, a footy game, a movie theatre, a forum for Commodore or Mac owners, St Paddy's Day...

Next is Social Space. This is where we cluster around a common interest or focus (e.g. a BBQ, local pub, workplace, school event, party or function). Here you connect on a superficial level, sharing snapshots of yourself - who I am, what I enjoy, where I live, where I work... This is a natural space to be introduced to new people, ideas, invites - a great springboard to the other spaces.

A little more intimate is our Personal Space. This is a smaller group of our friends and family, close work colleagues, mums group, etc. Here we know each other well and share more privately, reflect together on faith, share our lives, pray for one another, care for one another. Jesus had this connection with his twelve disciples.

And finally there is our Intimate Space. This is only shared with a few people - our spouse and one or two close friends. These people know us as we really are - the good and the ugly. In this space we feel safe and secure to share the naked truth about ourselves, what we think, what we struggle with - the deepest parts of ourselves. Jesus shared some things only with his closest friends - Peter, James and John.

The idea is that healthy community is a combination of all of these spaces, not just the deep, intimate ones. So you're in danger if you're connecting in the public space but not anywhere more personal. And you're also missing out if you connect in deep intimate relationships but avoid larger settings where you might run in to new people.

Churches have tended to view the deep, personal settings (like accountability groups, one-to-one discipleship and mentoring) as the places where spiritual growth happens and so have worked to push people towards the inner spaces. Myers calls us to value each of the four spaces equally and recognise that God is active in shaping us at every level.

What about you? Which spaces do you feel most comfortable? Are there any that you're missing out on? What changes could you make so you can find a sense of belonging at every level?

Our Church: Small and Simple

If we can't fit in a home, we'll start another group.

Small, simple groups have many advantages over big congregations (which is why big congregations work hard to get everyone into a small group!). Here are just a few....

Community. It's easier in a small group to get to know the other people, do life together, and look out for each other. Small is easier for food and conversation. Small groups grow community more naturally – you don't have to work so hard on community; the struggle is trying to avoid it! You can't go unnoticed in a small group - you are involved whether you like it or not. Small church becomes like a family or team more easily than an organisation.

Simplicity. Practically, small, simple churches have many advantages over more complicated ones. They are much easier to start up, sustain and adapt. Many more people could run a home group than could run a big church, which means we could potentially grow many more churches by using simple church thinking. Pastors of big churches have to be extraordinary. The bigger the church, the more exceptional the pastor must be, and if a pastor finishes up, it can take months to find someone else for the role. Simple churches, on the other hand, can be run by more everyday people, because there are no teams, programs, strategies, administration, services, sermons or staff to worry about. Any problems can be worked out by the group together, with extra wisdom from outside experts wherever needed. And small groups are much more flexible if changes are required. These are some of the reasons why simple church expressions might be an effective way forward for the church in Australia.

Mission. This flexibility means that small churches can more easily reflect the surrounding culture, work their way into existing communities and influence them from the inside out. Smaller groups can connect more individually with people outside the church, although this generally happens more slowly. Jesus compared the kingdom of heaven to a mustard seed, which slowly grows into a not-particularly-large weed-like bush that is very difficult to get rid of and tends to pop up all over the place.

Large churches with many ministries require many people to keep them running, and the best church members gradually spend more and more of their time on the church community (services, home groups, playgroups, music teams, camps, leadership, youth/men's/women's/children's ministry and so on) - which can sometimes lead to spending less time with the non-church people in their life. Simple church recognizes that everyone is already a part of various communities (work, school, uni, mums groups, sports teams) and we try to encourage members to connect with the people in these communities better, to be Jesus where they already are.

Our church has only one official get-together a week, so as to make room for real life: dinners, coffees, BBQs, sports, picnics, family days, school prayer groups, fishing, community festivals, watching the footy, and so on....

Discipleship. Churches have for many years recognised that discipleship happens best in small group settings where there is space for conversation. People grow at different rates and God is doing something different in everybody's life, and the best discipleship adapts to these changes as they come. A small group conversation allows for personal questions (try sticking your hand up during a sermon to clarify something or offer a different perspective!) and provides the space to relate Jesus' message and way of life to people's individual lives - to their particular work setting, family environment, personality, skill set and to their own dreams for the world.

There are just a few to whet your appetite.

Technology makes us lazy

A mate of mine recently pointed out that iPads are being used more and more in school classrooms these days. He didn't like the idea at all and said that he reckons technology makes us lazy. He also reckoned that kids will miss a lot because the iPad does so much for them, like spelling, writing and maths. I've got a few thoughts on the topic that I'll post in the next week or so, but what do you think?

Does technology make us lazy? Should it be used less in the education of our kids?

Rain, gluey kids and simple church

I don't know if you've ever tried to have a conversation with someone in the middle of a kids festival before. Strangely enough I've found myself in this situation quite a few times - twice even in the last week. The first time wasn't planned though. It was meant to be a relaxing conversation with a friend at the peaceful Powerhouse cafe overlooking the Brisbane River. Turned out the Powerhouse was in the middle of their big school holiday festival. Look out for it next time if you've got primary-aged kids. Give it a miss if you want a quiet conversation. And maybe check the weather too, like we didn't.

Still, in between dodging little kids with gluey hands and trying to stop the rain from diluting our cappuccinos, we managed to have a conversation worthy of the cheerleader tag. The gentleman I met with has been involved in starting a simple church group over the last year or so. When I say "simple church" I mean it doesn't have organised services or paid staff. It's a small group of people who are keen to follow Jesus and are flexible in how that might look for them. Actually, sometimes I wonder if "simple" might be a bit misleading. My church lately has been having quite a few of our Jesus conversations in amongst rain and gluey kids.

The group that my Powerhouse friend belongs to call themselves "The Assembly of Grapes," which in itself is telling.

There are a few of these around and they all look different depending on the people in the group. One of the key aims of Postcard Radio (the people I work with) is to find these simple church groups and support them however we can. It can feel lonely in these small groups sometimes, especially for leaders. It's a different way of operating than the normal church way and sometimes you can feel like a bit of a lone ranger. There are a lot of people on this journey though, and some really good ideas are being tried and experimented with. We'd like to help pass around some of these ideas and stories if we can.

If you are in a simple church group in QLD, please let us know! We'd love to know what groups are around - so we can support and encourage the groups and facilitators, and also to help individuals connect in with some of these like-minded people.

On a different note to finish, here's something that stuck in my head from my rain-soaked friend last week: "I think that much of the time the church is answering questions that the community isn't asking. We need to spend more time listening to people. Like the catholic priest who started out his ministry by setting up a couple of chairs at the local shopping centre, and just sat there. Most of the time he sat by himself, but when some crisis events happened people were lining up to talk."

Listen to your neighbourhood, like Michael Frost talked about in the last video I posted. Sit there. Have the coffees. Get amongst the families and kids. Find out the questions people are really asking.

Listen to your neighbourhood!

Here's a clip well worth a watch. Michael Frost talking about mission in the neighbourhood.

State of Origin and the Gospel

Just to preempt those sermons being prepared for this Sunday: the State of Origin is not like the kingdom of heaven.

Over to you, commenters.

Review: Sherlock Holmes and the Needle's Eye

I've often wished to be in a situation where someone might shout desperately "If only there were a theologian nearby!" And I could step up and modesty say "I am one. Maybe I can help." But I suppose that may never happen in real life. Ah well, much the pity.

I got to experience this a little while reading "Sherlock Holmes and the Needle's Eye" though. In this fiction book (provided by booksneeze.com) Holmes and Watson have procured a time machine which they use to travel backwards in history and solve ten Bible mysteries. There are discussion questions for each mystery at the end so groups can try to solve it before reading the solution. At various points as Sherlock and Dr Watson are deliberating I almost wished I was present so I could say "Oh I know that one!" But alas.

The book is clever. It's interesting to see some of the Bible events from a first-person perspective, like David and Goliath. And I enjoyed the banter between Holmes, the doctor and Mrs Watson. At some points it can get a little preachy, where the author is trying to teach theology at the same time. It feels less like the real Holmes and Watson at these points, but I see what the author is trying to do. Actually, I'd like to read a non-religious Sherlock Holmes book from this author. I like his style of writing. He captures the fun and intelligence of the characters brilliantly.

There are a couple of apocalyptic-style events that the author includes which feel really out of place. Even in the Bible I don't believe these are meant to be seen as happening in real life. And some of the "mysteries" are not quite as fascinating as Holmes' usual fare (eg "Why did Paul start his second missionary journey in Phillipi?" Why oh why). All in all I found it entertaining though.

There'll be a lot of church people who will like this book. But I wouldn't give it to non-Christian friends.

Review: Dirty God

I just finished "Dirty God," by Johnnie Moore, generously provided by BookSneeze.com. The book is all about grace and it's written in two parts: "Getting Grace" and "Giving Grace."

I loved the first part. The author writes so poetically, explaining with clarity and passion what God has done for us, leaving behind the riches and control of heaven to move into our neighbourhood. As Moore puts it...

"Jesus didn’t keep his distance from the messy world that he descended into when he left heaven’s golden streets for earth’s dusty Middle Eastern villages, filled to capacity with the poor and frustrated, the disenfranchised and the rejected. Jesus didn’t revel in his priceless glory—rather, he gave himself completely to the opportunity to make the inglorious feel that they mattered to God.”

It's amazing grace, and it's not just for the best of us. Jesus chose to spend all of his time with everyday people - people from small fishing towns, not the big city. Ordinary people, not superstars, not overly smart, spiritual, or even ambitious. The grace God gives us is for anyone.

I reckon this book should have been two books. The second half is good too, but it kind of moves the book in a different direction and offers a bit more of the author's own perspectives on what everyday life should look like for us. I would rather if those questions ("How can we pass this grace on?" etc) were woven into the first part of the book and not answered as much, so that the whole thing remains focused on God's grace and the practical questions of everyday life are left open for readers to answer themselves.

Just my thoughts. Well worth a read anyway.

The Army

Imagine you have just completed training to be a lifesaver on QLD beaches. It comes to your first day on the job and you are looking forward to rescuing people who are struggling in the surf. But instead of supplying you with floatation devices and an inflatable rescue boat, your instructor gives you... a gun.

It seems to me this is close to the situation we have with our army, although vastly simplified. I've had many conversations about war and the defense force before, and often I've heard people say "but they're really doing aid work, rebuilding, protecting families, keeping the peace." To which I say "Brilliant, but if that's what they're doing, why all the weapons and military training?"

When that's your training and those are the resources most readily at your fingertips, peacemaking options and creative solutions also become very limited. Imagine if we only gave lifesavers a gun? I would guess that deaths on beaches would escalate and there would be a lot less rescues.

Now dream with me. What if all the money spent on our defense force was spent instead on nonviolent aid instead? What if all the time spent training these millions of people for the military was spent training them for humanitarian work? What if the brilliant minds at the top were enlisted to find creative nonviolent ways to organise nations, creative nonviolent ways to work through conflict and threat, and creative nonviolent ways to bring world peace?

I'm convinced we COULD have world peace if more nations started thinking like this. It wouldn't even need to be all of them.

Feeling Guilty About the Crusades

Every Friday afternoon during the last period of the school week I find myself helping out in a year 8 class discussing history. I assist this entertaining group of students a few times each week (one of the various things I do as a chaplain), but for some reason Friday afternoon history is my favourite.

Last week as the lesson began I learned that the topic they were learning about was the Crusades. A brief explanation in case you were doodling and passing notes in year 8 history....

As per my recently refreshed knowledge thanks to Mrs Caple, the Crusades were religious wars fought by Christians against (mostly) Muslims between the 11th and 16th centuries with the aim to recover Jerusalem and the surrounding area ("the holy land"). Jerusalem was important to both sides for religious reasons. The Pope kicked it off, the Catholic Church repeated the call and the kings dutifully led their armies out (at this point the Catholic Church had a huge amount of power, even and especially with the monarchy). Several hundred thousand soldiers responded, some for glory, some for adventure, and many for more basic reasons: they would be fed. It was a violent and dark time in history, and the "Christian" church were the main perpetrators.

As the lesson began - well aware that my chaplain hat was unavoidably atop my noggin - I thought to myself "This could be awkward."

As a pastor and as a Christian I've had many conversations with non-Christian folk where I've tried to explain how good and worthwhile Christianity is - how great it would be and what an amazingly different world we'd have if more people lived Jesus' way.

"Well, what about the Crusades then?" people have replied. That was a time in history, they point out, where entire nations were "Christian" and yet took it upon themselves to slaughter everyone else (not just Muslims). It's a pretty crushing response and it's been very difficult in these conversations to find anything else to say. Even though it was hundreds of years ago in a medieval world, I've felt a fair bit of guilt over this dark part of history.

There has been a lot of church-bashing going on in the last few decades and the Crusades is one of the more well-worn blunt instruments.

Recently at a pastors conference that I attended, one of the speakers (who'd had similar conversations with his buddies) encouraged us to take the humble approach: although it wasn't us fighting those wars, we need to own up to it and just wear it because we wear the Christian name. (Similar to how our prime minister Kevin Rudd said sorry to all indigenous Australians on behalf of... who exactly?)

I think humility is definitely the right course of action whatever we do, but I also believe that in this instance that answer might actually prove to be a little unhelpful. Here's an illustration....

This week the Australian Rugby League State of Origin is on, for which I'm a very proud Queensland supporter. Suppose that in a club somewhere on Wednesday night a drunken fight breaks out over a dodgy ref's call and a QLD supporter leaves a NSW fan in a coma. Should I then hang my head in shame for the rest of my life because like that drunken thug I also support Queensland?

Or suppose it was discovered that during the world wars of last century one of the secret Nazi organisations devoted to wiping out the "inferior" races was code-named World Vision. Should today's World Vision aid organisation hang its head in shame and wear the wrongs of that Nazi group?

Or suppose someone was to steal my identity and then under my name start up a crack-dealing crime syndicate. Should I then go and apologise to anyone who's affected? "It was all done under my name. I'm so sorry for ruining your life. I'm heading to the cops now so they can lock me away." Of course not. That would be ridiculous. Once it was established that someone was using my identity I'd be perfectly in the clear. "It was just somebody using Ben's name."

I think you get it. Jesus himself said once "You can tell a tree by its fruit." If you go to Bunnings and buy a lemon tree and find out later that it grows oranges, it doesn't mean you should call David Attenborough because you've discovered an amazing new variety of lemon tree. It means someone at Bunnings put the wrong tag on the tree. If it grows oranges, it's an orange tree.

Although the Crusades were fought under the "Christian" name, they were nothing at all like Christ. They were in fact pretty much the exact opposite of Jesus. Jesus was a compassionate, inclusive and accepting, humble man devoted to peace. While many of his fellow Jews wanted to stage a violent military revolution against the oppressing Romans, Jesus taught about sacrificial love, unrelenting grace and above all he painted a vision of a future world that could include everyone, free of pain and heartache, violence and corruption.

The word "Christian" literally means "little Christ." It was originally given to Jesus' followers in the first century because people looked at them and thought "These people are just like Jesus."

Last week in that year 8 history class, I found that I don't feel guilt anymore when someone talks about the Crusades. Because to me, those soldiers, those kings and the violent, power-hungry "church" were not Christians at all. They were not "little Christs." They were not like Jesus at all. I similarly disown the violent and racist "Christian" groups of modern-day times. There are a lot of "Christians" in the world but a lot fewer people who actually look like Jesus.

Don't look at the tag. You can tell a tree by its fruit.